Monday, March 30, 2009

Finally, Some Good News

Yes, we finally have something good to share! My recent CT scan shows that the chemo is providing a positive response! I've still have a long ways to go, but at least some progress has been made.

We also enjoyed a great relaxing and romantic weekend in Kananaskis at the Delta thanks to our friends Curtis & Taryn. They held a Pink Party for us back in October, and their friends and family all pitched in to send us on a weekend getaway. This gift was very generous, and we sincerely thank each and every one of them for sending us. Carman and I love being in the mountains so much, and it felt good to be amidst nature. We were spoiled with trips to the spa, tasty meals, and a suite fit for a rock star.

On our way home we stopped of in Calgary and enjoyed a great East Indian meal with 12 close friends. Thanks for the great evening!

Monday, March 23, 2009

Trust

Carman brought it to my attention that it has been about a month since my last post and that many of you are probably wondering what is going on. Well, it feels like little is going on in my world yet everything. I had my 3rd chemo round on March 6th and my sister Tara was recruited to be the weekend nurse as Carman was working at the Home and Acreage Show. She did a fine job of putting away laundry and unloading the dishwasher. We also enjoyed a trip to the mall with my friend Rhonda for Yogen Fruz.

This crossroads in my life is still bringing me a lot of anguish. Prior to my cancer diagnosis I was a very motivated, productive, and fit person. I now struggle to get a small list of things done in a day and my body often feels like a stranger. Rationally I know this is because I am getting chemo, but my emotions often could care less about 'rational reasoning'. I want to be able to get outside for my 2 long walks every day with Rudy, I want to have the brain power to pick up my books again so I can write the final CFP exam (I was so close to being done), I want to feel like I am contributing to my marriage versus taking all of the time. But most of all, I want to give up my plans for the future so I can participate in the plan that Jesus has for me - I just don't have a clue on how to go about doing that. I just started reading a book on Trusting God. It is so easy to praise God and trust him when times are good, but when times are bad, for me, that ability to trust has been hard. However, when I contemplate God's sovereignty, even the painful stuff is worked into his plan for the goodness of his kingdom, and my life. I admit, my simple human brain cannot comprehend how all this can be worked for good, but I am working on trusting God that it is.

Peace Out.