Thursday, July 9, 2009

The Dreaded Wednesday


With round 8 behind me I enter my 'ugly days'. From about Tuesday to Saturday the harsh side effects of chemo appears. My body aches (which is an understatement), nothing tastes right, nausea, and my digestive system is out-of-wack. Wednesday always seems to be the hardest. This round Carman insisted that I only read, watch tv, or sleep - so boring! But, I always over-do-it and pay for it later so I decided to listen to him for a change. The days have been long, but I don't feel as crappy.

If there was a reading contest this summer I think they would be putting my name on a trophy. TV has lost its entertainment value with me so reading is keeping me occupied. I'm averaging a book every other day. My friend Alvina lent me some books by Immaculee Ilibagiza who survived the Rwandan genocide. Her story deeply touched me and her faith was inspirational. I highly recommend reading her books. I would love some book recommendations - what are your favorite books?

The shock of cancer has been settling. For the first 10 months I felt totally out of my element - in a foggy other world. You just go through the motions to do what you have to do, but the pain and uncertainty is extremely overwhelming. I have forgotten what it feels like to feel 'good', but I am looking forward to chemo being over and starting the process of true healing and discovering this new life that lays ahead of me.

Carman took this picture of me last night. The 'chipmunk' look is a side effect of the steroids. When I look at the picture I laugh because I can't believe that is me - wow!

4 comments:

E. Tyler Rowan said...

I love anything by Francine Rivers - powerful, moving, Scripture-based fiction.

BIll and Sharon said...

Brenda, I was listening to the CBC today during my travels in the truck/office. The topic of the day was what's your favorite book. Here's the list they complied. Take note of "Ragged Company". I am sure you will enjoy that one. By the way , chipmunks are cute so therefore so are you. Do as Carman says ... rest! And listen to what the Good Lord has to say to you.
- The Birth House/ Ami McKay
-Fall on Your Knees/ Ann-Marie MacDonald
- The Book of Negros/ Lawrence Hill
-Ragged Company/ Alberta author Richard Wagamese
-Water for Elephants/ Sara Gruen
-Nineteen Minutes/ Jodi Picoult
-Disobedience/Jane hamilton
-Twice Born/ Alberta author Pauline Gedge
-The Hobbit/ J.R.R. Tolkein
-Magyk/ Angie Sage
-Mr. Pip/ Lloyd Jones
-A Rule Against Murder & The Cruelest Month/ Louise Penny

Kami said...

Hey B! I read the Alchemist awhile back...it was good. (not sure of author it was just one of the top sellers in Chapters). I also have started Eat Pray Love but haven't finished yet...so far so good.
Please do as Carman says and take the rest, your body needs it.
love you and think of you often!
kami

Anonymous said...

You looked gorgeous to me...you still got it!!! I hope "Ruby Therapy" was helpful this weekend! Have some wonderful dreams about your healthy and happy future!